A Dad’s Open Letter to God for His Kid who Died During the Typhoon

Childs Angel

Child's Angel

Remember when I shared my thoughts over social networks that I felt deeply sad for a friend who lost his daughter on one of the landslides brought by Typhoon Pepeng? My friend changed his Facebook profile picture and I noticed, so I found myself visiting his profile on that in the hope that I could leave some words of comfort.

However, I was surprised at the letter that accompanied the picture.

My Dearest Yana,

Do you have facebook in heaven? Maybe God plays Angelville that’s why you’re no longer with Dad. God harvested you because you have done so much good and matured a lot earlier. I do miss you a lot, maybe you can read this and then tell me that you are alright, or better yet, drop me a line will you? Invite me as your neighbor, anyway I know I am not ready to be with you yet. I still have Mommy and your sisters to take care of. It won’t be an easy job without you, but somehow I know I will manage. Because you are there watching and guiding me to do good…

How is it that God needs you more than I?……
I guess I will never know.

I do cry a lot and I try to hide it, but you can see me right? You’ve made dad very sad. But I know it’s not your intention. I feel that you miss me too, you miss your mommy, ate Yami and Yael. There are reasons why you’re not here anymore. I just hope I have the strength and courage to wait for those answers. You are so brave, I want to be brave like you, but to be brave, it means I have to let go…

Daddy wants to be brave, so I am letting go and accept that I won’t see you in this lifetime again.
But it’s not easy…but I have to. I have to believe that everything is alright.
I have to believe that we will be alright. I just want to believe that life is still good after you’ve left us and the pain of missing you will make daddy and mommy strong.
I want to have faith in everything…

So Daddy can let go…
Please do take care of yourself, I was not there when you needed me most and I am so sorry. I am still in so much pain from that thought. I wish could have done something. If only daddy went home early. I am really sorry. I just wanted the best for you, I know you understand that.

I will miss the times that you’ve been very patient with me, understanding my faults and seeing through my insecurities. Loving you and to be loved by you is one of the best things that ever happened to dad and losing you is my greatest hurt…

I love you Yana, so much. You are now daddy’s angel. Be with me always.

Love,
Your Dad
xxx

P.S.
To God,
Please do take care of my baby Yana. She’s a very special kid. She too will take care of you just as she took care of me. I am quite jealous of you now, her embraces and kisses will be yours to keep but only mine to remember and long for. She likes listening to stories, please tell her how great a child she is to me. That she is her mommy’s sunshine, ate Yami’s pride and Yael’s miracle. Tell her that we love her so dearly. Tell her things I could not. Show her the love that I wasn’t able to give. Tell her I miss her…

with permission from R. Dulay

This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged after the death of a child, coping with the death of a child, on death of a child. Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to A Dad’s Open Letter to God for His Kid who Died During the Typhoon

  1. Ruthi says:

    The letter made me cry and left a lump on my throat. Very touchy. I could feel the Dad's pain and longing. It was indeed sad but the Dad's acceptance of the situation and his trust in God made everything a blessing instead both for himself and the little girl Yana.

    Thanks Gem for sharing this. It made me realized once again how precious life is and appreciate it more. Take care.

  2. edelweiza says:

    very touching. i can imagine the tears and emotions pouring out from him while writing this letter. brave dad. somehow, i feel God and her daughter have read this already and felt good. :)

  3. maricor says:

    touching. i could only read it in fragments.

  4. fortuitous faery says:

    oh no…and i think i know this mr. dulay from baguio you speak of. my sister and i knew him years ago through chat. we almost met him in person, but he was away from his workplace when we came.

    this is so sad…

  5. berryblitz says:

    Ang lungkot. I wanna cry. I hate situations like that.

  6. neth says:

    aaaahhhh…i also miss my dad and my sister..they both died last feb 13,2009 at the same date..mahirap talaga mawalan ng mahal sa buhay..

  7. neth says:

    i do cry a lot and i try to hide it…but i know they can see me!..we need to accept that we wont see them in this lifetime again..siguro dahil may reason si God kaya sila kinuha sa atin..

  8. mHai says:

    i want to share this to my friends. hope you would allow me. it’s a nice story but so sad. :(

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>