That Facebook Ex: To “Friend” or Not to “Friend”?

Social networking sites makes the world go smaller everyday. It wasn’t this way when my grandparents were at my age now.

My Facebook profile is a hodgepodge of old and new friends including former classmates, office mates, and new acquaintances and people whom I met online. Along that mixture is a sprinkle of old flames – Facebook exes that I had!

Facebook parental controls

Did I “friend” them? Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don’t, but oftentimes I am the one who sit and wait for their friend request, if ever they get to make one. Even if I apparently found them first in Facebook, I would rather not hit the friend request button to a Facebook ex initiate friendship. Why would I have to? To see them with their happy wives and happy kids? To see their publicly available photos of kissing their girlfriends?

So maybe I wasn’t able overcome my feelings for them, and that I dwell too much in the past?


But maybe this belief is true, that love scars do remain in one’s heart. I still feel that tinge of hurt feeling at over looking at the past, even if my heart is ready for a new relationship, a hopeful yearning for a new love. Whenever I look at those profiles I couldn’t help but wonder, what if, things were different – that I ended up being with that guy through thick and thin?

Those guys had moved on, and I occasionally see their news-feed containing happy photos of their wives and kids, or their long-time girlfriends.

On another thought, I had those former suitors over a decade back and I realized that, even if I had plenty of old friends and classmates friending me, I only had too few of these guys friending me in Facebook. Do they have that same hesitant feeling of “friend”-ing me, not wanting to see how life had turned out for me?

image by Arwen Abendstern

About Gem

Gem is a Baguio-based blogger, an electronics engineer by profession but enjoys working at home full time as both a freelance web designer and blogger.

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